Monday, November 19, 2012

"Blackwater Men" Workshop


The story is about a young Native American man’s life with drugs. The story follows him from the time he is fourteen and ends when he is twenty-one. The other central characters are his friend Randy, his father, and his grandfather. There are three central events. The first is the meth incident in the bathroom that estranges Randy and Fresco. The second is Fresco’s grandfather’s death, which spurs Fresco’s father to force Fresco to get a job and go to college. The third is Fresco’s reunion with Randy and their heist at the casino.
            I liked the relationship between Fresco and Randy—the beginning started to set up a strong camaraderie that I thought would be nearly unbreakable. However, on page five, Fresco completely betrays Randy (though Randy never finds out) and the two are separated until page eleven. I feel like the important moments happen when the boys are together, and therefore I was disappointed when Randy left the story. Perhaps consider cutting a lot of the middle and keeping the two of them together throughout the piece.
            Also, I feel like Randy may be the more interesting character. After all, he’s the one who gives Fresco his nickname and comes up with the idea to try meth, whereas Fresco does nothing but smoke when Randy’s not around. Then only after Randy returns does Fresco manage to rob the casino. Therefore, I feel like Randy is the leader in this duo. Overall, I’d like to see some more development in these two characters and their relationship with one another.

No comments:

Post a Comment